On a recent episode of Dr. Phil, a man was confronted about his addiction to World of Warcraft, otherwise known as liquid crack. Angry Seafood has acquired the transcript through very unscrupulous means. We bought it for $6 using money stolen from an old blind lady I saw in the park the other day.

I’m kidding she really wasn’t blind.

Dr Phil: Welcome Bob and Sue. Bob, your wife here tells me you play World of Warcraft for 80 hours a week.

Bob: Hold on there Phil. I stop for a few minutes to eat.

Sue: Yeah, frigging Hot Pockets.

Bob: Whatever. My son plays with me as well so it’s good for our relationship.

Sue: YOUR son also demanded his breakfast the other day then called me a “dirty whore”!

Bob: Horde, honey, horde. For the millionth time the Horde are one of the alliances.

Phil: Okay folks, let’s settle down. So Bob you have a what, level 70, I guess player in Wow?

Bob: Yes, it is the highest you can go.

Phil: And what do you do in Wow?

Bob: We go on raids, kill raid bosses, stuff like that.

(The audiences’ eyes collectively glaze over)

The game is like life Phil. You always want something better. Get a better house, a better job, a better wife, better kids.

Sue: You could do all that trading-up with me in real life…with your family.

Phil: I think I’m seeing the problem here. Sue, you are too fat to play with your kids and your husband resents you for it.

Sue: What? Dr. Phil, I’m not overweight. And what the hell does that have to do with this?

Bob: Honey, listen to him, he’s a doctor.

Phil: In fact, I’ve got a gurney, a medical team, and an ambulance waiting backstage to rush you to the hospital…

Sue: (Standing up) What the hell are you talking about? Bob is BLEEP! ing addicted to a video game. He quit his job and he plays 80 BLEEP! ing hours a week! He’s an addict.

Bob: Now honey, don’t get upset. Phil might be right.

Sue: Bob I want a divorce!

Phil: Here comes the nurse now to give you a sedative Sue.

(Nurse comes on stage and sticks a needle in Sue’s arm)

Phil: Nighty-night Sue.

(The nurse and an intern drag Sue offstage)

Sue: Come…back…here…you…rabbit…

Phil: Bob, I know that was difficult, but remember it’s for her own good.  Are you going to be alright?

Bob: I think I will. There’s a big raid tonight in Wow so…

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[Humor-Blogs.com has funny blogs about World of Warcraft. Not really though. Blog-Storm.com does not either.]