Bloggers Speak: LOBO from Predator Press

Welcome to ‘Bloggers Speak’ the on-going Angry Seafood feature where I sit down with other humorists and ask them a bunch of crazy and odd questions. Today I am joined by LOBO from the humor blog Predator Press and this time around there’s a bit of a political/geo-political angle.

How’s it hangin’ LOBO?

Wow I’m glad you brought that up. It’s actually tanning in the backyard, and I forgot to set the egg timer.

Worst movie trilogy of all time?

Honestly, I can’t thing of a good one. Lord of the Rings maybe? Fifteen nonstop hours of little teeny bigfoots obsessed with jewelry seems rather grueling. Middle Earth needed a ‘hood’:

Frodo: “Yo man, Golem just lifted my bling.”

Sam: “Aight. We’ll go pop a cap in his ass after that tight Aerosmith babe crosses over us on this here rickety wooden bridge one more time. Did you know Rivendell has eighty-seven translations for ‘panties’?”

Frodo: “Word.”

Is Canada still an active country?

I just checked a satellite image and it appears to still be just north of us, exactly where it was when I was in Geography class.

-At this point I would conclude that it isn’t going anywhere.

Who was funnier, Hitler or Che?

Neither. In fact those guys we so un-funny, they grew mustaches in advance so we couldn’t even “funny them up” on the posters.

Mao. Now that’s a guy with a great sense of humor.

Van Halen question- Sammy or Dave?

Dave Dave Dave Dave Dave. “The best parties are the ones where you are the least interesting person there.” Without Dave, I’m sure ‘Mammoth’ would’ve been a good band, but that’s all. Dave did the guerilla marketing to get Van Halen on the map, and completely reinvented the live performance. Those slurry licks trailing out on Drop Dead Legs still give me goose bumps, and I never would’ve heard ‘em if not for Dave. Sure maybe he was a jerk. But he had a vision and ran with it; Sammy merely drove off with in the trunk at 54 mph.

Which celebrity would you curse with a plague and why? (Can’t answer Ryan Seacrest or anyone from American Idol)

Paris Hilton and/or what’s-her-face from “A Simple Life.” I don’t like a premise that revolves around rich flakes making fun of the working class. It’s sickening. I keep hoping there’s an episode where Charlize Theron pounces out and beats them both to death with a tire iron. And while plagues are nice, freezing them in liquid nitrogen to chip off small pieces while squishing your toes in the goo seems more gratifying.

Would invading Panama to take back the Canal help oil prices?

When Panama was released by Van Halen in 1984 –circa David Lee Roth I might add- vinyl records were made of oil. But the experience of producing my Spanish Fly Industrial Complex CDs revealed that oil is still required for production no matter how unpronounceable the country your sweatshop is located. And once Paris Hilton’s pager goes off, well, you do the math.

Someone makes the discovery that semen can be used as an alternative fuel source. Good or bad for the porn industry?

Well that’s just good for everybody.

Thanks for taking the time to hang out with Angry Seafood. Any final thoughts LOBO?

Well thanks for having me; I’m a big fan. And special thanks to Al Gore for making this moment possible; the creation of the Internet has given us something that will one day doubtlessly be regarded as a giant Evolutionary step, and the unmatched ability to instantly communicate with the other side of the planet rivals telepathy. This will alter the species. Thanks to Gore’s invention, we can now more efficiently harvest our beloved planet to the husk of every succulent last morsel via satellite, move and track the resources by vigilant computers using tightly-followed timetables, and calculate the diminishing supply against the search for other worlds deserving of our Enlightened Control.

And always remember: Use pornography for good. Never evil.

LOBO’s question for the readers:

Was that my egg timer going off?

---

Humor-blogs.com loves blogger interviews.

---

If you enjoyed this post, why not subscribe to the RSS feed? Not sure what RSS is or how to subscribe? Click Here