Welcome to another edition of Bloggers Speak where Angry Seafood interviews the authors of humor blogs. We are joined today by Theresa from the humor blog ‘The Rain in Spain’.

Chris: Welcome to the feature Theresa. How are you doing?

Theresa: Well, it’s not raining and I have toilet paper, so I can’t complain.

C: What European country is the weirdest and why?

T: I would have to say Belgium. I mean, it’s a place that can’t figure out if it’s French or Dutch, and its best known symbol is a statue of a little boy peeing. How weird is that? Besides those chocolate boobies they sell everywhere kind of ick me out. On the other hand, it is the country that gave us Audrey Hepburn, so it can’t be all that bad.

C: Great taste or less filling?

T: Great taste, without a doubt. After all, I live in Spain. Can you imagine what diet Sangria would be like?

C: How can I tell if my rat is pregnant?

T: What, isn’t there a Rat Predictor? Of course getting a rat to pee on a stick might be kind of hard, so I guess you’re better off just waiting. After a while the question just resolves itself.

C: Do you ever wonder if you hate Paris Hilton, or if it’s just the jealousy taking over?

T: No, hate and jealousy are not quite the words I’d use to describe my feelings about Paris. Anyone who runs around without underwear to get people’s attention just deserves pity (and very cold privates).Besides, how could I be jealous of somebody who’s named after a hotel in France? No, I don’t think so. I can just imagine the conversations of the guys she goes out with:

“Dude, I just spent a night in the Paris Hilton!”

“Whoa, so what was that like?”

“Well, I was kind of disappointed.I mean, it’s supposed to be an exclusive thing, but these days almost anyone can get in.”

And when reading things like ‘Katie Holmes and Posh do Paris’ you can never quite be sure if they’re talking about a trip to the capital city of France, or another of Paris’ lesbian exploits.It’s pathetic really.

(Editor’s note: And hot.)

C: What do you have against leaf blowers?

T: Well, they’re stupid, loud and environmentally irresponsible.Actually, they’re a lot like many politicians…in other words, they blow.

C: Which are worse, Gypsies or the French?

T: What, do you mean in bed? Sorry, but I don’t have any personal experience to share, but I could set you up on a couple of dates if you want to find out for yourself.

C: If someone came up to you, said “gobble gobble” then walked off, what would you do?

T: I’d say, “Off with its head! That’s our Christmas dinner, don’t let it get away!” Nah, just kidding, we don’t eat people over here anymore….I think that went out of style with the Inquisition.

C: What does Spain smell like?

T: Well, now that Posh Spice has left it smells ever so much better.

C: Thanks a lot for taking the time to do this interview Theresa. Any parting thoughts?

T: Thanks for inviting me over Chris. I’m honored to find myself in the company of so many talented bloggers. Oh, and one more thing. Is the seafood angry because you’re about to eat it? If so, I’m really glad I’m not a lobster.

Theresa’s question for the readers:If God is omnipotent, then why didn’t he make the Universe in one day and rest the other six?
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