Welcome to Bloggers Speak where I sit down with other humor bloggers and ask them a bunch of crazy and odd questions. Today I am joined by a newcomer to the blogsphere, Julius Bloop from the humor blog Julius Bloop.

How’s it hanging Julius?

Pretty great when I’m awake enough to enjoy life. And when I’m not thinking about things. Or doing stuff. Other than that, yeah, it’s hanging great!

Why would a man on a Harley be wearing a diaper and panty hose?

Um…because he’s wants an erection! Hello?

If Hollywood could make a sequel to any movie or another sequel what would be their worst choice and what would the plot be?

McDonalds, because first of all, it’s not a movie – it’s a fast food restaurant. Secondly, what are you going to serve at McDonald’s 2? Chinese food? It just makes no sense. But, it does make me want some drivethru Chinese food. Hey, I wonder if McDonalds 2 is open?

Van Halen question- Sammy or Dave?

Well, Dave might as well jump because Sammy can’t drive 55 so I figure the answer probably has something to do with the golden ratio. Although, I think if some radioactive goop spilled on their heads and made their hair sentient – Sammy’s hair would wrap around Dave’s like an anaconda and choke every last puffy cuticle out of his spandex-wearing scalp. Sammy’s hair wins.

What would America be like if Paris Hilton was President?

Oh, it would be vastly different. A rich and spoiled brat would rule the free world and her lack of experience wouldn’t matter. Heck, people would have voted her in based on her looks and political ties in spite of her alarmingly low level of intelligence. Oh, it would be much different indeed. My stars!

Someone makes the discovery that semen can be used as an alternative fuel source. How does the government attempt to regulate it?

You know those huge water towers that are in every town? And they usually have the name of the town written on it in huge letters? Well, basically the government would ignore those and just put more semen in Gatorade.

If you could create your own court procedural drama what would it focus on?

It would be a cross between Judge Judy, Law & Order, and Night Court. Except instead of being about the judiciary system, it’d just be a sassy old woman solving crimes in a hilarious manner. “Don’t pee on my leg and tell me he’s guilty!”

What should we do about the French?

I’ve never met a French, nor have I visited their homeland because I don’t like the tundra. They’re the ones that hunt whales and burn their blubber for heat, right? I’ve never met a whale either – I wonder if there are gay whales? Wow, this glue smells great!

Thanks for taking the time to do this Julius. Any final thoughts?

(Editor’s Note: I think he passed out from the glue.)

Julius’ question for the readers:

Can I borrow some money? Like a lot of it? Pretty much all you have and some of your parent’s? Most of your parents? All of your parents. Hey, can I borrow your parents?!
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