Signs Someone is a Bag of Douche
Written by Chris C on September 12th, 2008
Sometimes you can just look at someone, like the over-tanned idiots above and know they are a total bag of douche. While some have this gift, not everyone is able to see the tell-tale signs. This list should help those of you who lack the clear insight needed to avoid bags of douche.
I would also like to point out that this list is not like the typical ‘top reasons or signs someone is a bag of douche‘. Having orange skin isn’t on here. Treating people like crap isn’t on here. Anyone can make a list with those qualities and besides, aren’t those simply inherent? It would be like making a list of who has seen Paris Hilton’s dirty spot.
The serious bags of douche exhibit these tell-tale signs:
1. They have an icon of a kid peeing on something in the back or side window.
2. They have purple lights under their car.
3. They wear official jerseys of their favorite sports team but are not actually on the team.
4. They wear Oakley sunglasses.
5. They are a contestant on MTV’s reality show ‘Next’.
6. They have incredibly hot and shallow girlfriends.
7. They have the speech capacity of Vin Diesel.
8. They can be described as ‘greasy’.
9. They are often photographed licking the side of a hot girl’s face.
What is your sign someone is a total bag of douche?
Humor-blogs.com has very funny blogs but not a lot of bags of douche, probably because they wouldn’t get the jokes.
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Shameless plug: Rickey’s running a live chat during this evening’s Mets game if any of you magnificent bastards wish to partake.
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How dare you expose me?
How dare you!?
:)
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@Rickey: You can shamelessly plug the weekly chat whenever you like.
@LOBO: If the bag fits…
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I’ll direct you to this site for the full bag experience.
http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com
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You know… Watching the fake tan move from one douche to the next reminded me of that 1982 hit remake ‘The Thing’, when the douche infection silently spread and…
Dr. Blair (Wilford Brimley), a biologist on the American team, studies cells from this Thing, and watches them attack and replicate other kinds of cells. Realizing that something like this could take over the world if it got out, he kills the surviving dogs and destroys the helicopter and the communications equipment. (IBD)
How do we kill the douche? People who want to save the planet must know.
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