January, 2008
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Licking Window #4: Animal Intervention
Monday, January 21st, 2008
Licking Windows #3:Three Bears
Monday, January 21st, 2008
Licking Windows #2: Post-Nuke
Monday, January 21st, 2008
Licking Windows #1: Anger Management
Monday, January 21st, 2008
Yahoo Answers-January 2008
Monday, January 21st, 2008
Like when people ask me what kind of dressing comes on the Caesar salad, there is no shortage of ridiculous questions at Yahoo Answers. In the past inquiring minds wanted to know how to waste eight of their nine lives or whether we should leave nature alone and the current crop of wondering souls does not disappoint.
“Why tiger always likes to attack the neck when it fights?”
They have learned how to take down a zoo visitor quickly over the years. They have adapted, evolved to counter the ever-increasing amount of teenagers who think it’s funny to get caged animals angry.
“Is it true that all Native Americans were always here in the americas. The history book says America was once uninhabited thousands of years ago and the Native Americans came here from Asia. My mother told me all the Native Americans were always here because the continents broke up.”
Yes, they were always here and it is a miracle that they survived the split of the continents. Imagine being a Native American hunting with your tribe when suddenly the Earth splits open, dividing the group. You watch them as they float off into the distance. Kind of like when Wilson went adrift in Cast Away.
Meanwhile, that other group now on a new continent vows revenge because you didn’t try to save them. They return to settle the score a couple thousand years later.
History is pretty fucked up I know. I also apologize for giving away the twist ending of Cast Away.
“Whar carnival ride are you?”
A roller coaster and everyone dies in the end. But there’s no long wait. It’s a paradox.
“What do you hate most about sociopaths?”
I hate how they do not want to conform to society. That and there’s no health care benefits.
“Is it crazy for a guy to shave all his pubic hair off do women like that really?”
Be glad you didn’t grow up back in the 80’s, before the time of trimming. Women had a Chia pet below the waist for crying out loud. I would imagine if she wants to take a visit south she doesn’t want curly hair tickling her eye so I would say it is not crazy.
“What does your handwriting say about you?”
As soon as I can read it I will let you know.
Humor-blogs.com does not ask questions. If they did it would be ones like: “are there mayonnaise testers?”
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Vote for Me for Santa Claus’ Blog of the Day
Saturday, January 19th, 2008We interrupt the weekend for this special news bulletin…
I just got word I have been nominated by the Jolly One himself for ‘Blog of the Day’ so head on over to Santa’s Blog of the Day and cast your vote for me if you’d like.
We now return you to the weekend. Enjoy the games and vote early and often.
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2008 NFL AFC/NFC Championship Week Pickfest
Friday, January 18th, 2008The Gods smiled upon football fans last week. Not only were the games great but Jeep swapped out its commercial spots for the sandbox ads instead. Best of all, no crappy 70’s song none of us have heard since AM radio was popular.
You can guess that I won’t be buying a Liberty anytime soon. But this is about football not marketing.
Once again this week I (at 5-3) am joined by Rickey (3-3) and Frogster (4-4) in the postseason prognostication fun. Things get real interesting with only three matchups left to predict. On a side note, Rickey has an interesting take on this week’s games, especially if you are from the Midwest.
San Diego Chargers vs. New England Patriots
This is an interesting dynamic. The Patriots used to be the monkey on the back of the Colts until a couple years ago. Then the Chargers took over that role and have thwarted Indy since then. Sunday they did it again.
But make no mistake about it. Teams came after the Colts every week because they are the defending champs. If a team wins a Super Bowl every other team that plays them the following season circles that one on their calendar.
I find it hard to see the Chargers pulling out a win unless the Pats make a lot of mistakes. Jacksonville played a hell of a game last week and executed perfectly. But they just are not as talented as a team compared to New England. It doesn’t help that San Diego’s top players are banged-up.
I envision this game a lot like Clubber Lang predicted for his match vs. Rocky in Rocky III: “pain”.
The Patriots win 32-24 and earn a trip to their sixth Super Bowl appearance and an excellent shot at their fourth championship in eight seasons. What’s next after dynasty?
*Frogster’s Pick: New England 49, San Diego 17
*Rickey’s Pick: New England 31 San Diego 14
New York Giants vs. Green Bay Packers
Don’t tell the Giants they aren’t supposed to be here, especially Eli. Can he do it again? Can the team do it again? Like the Cowboys, the Giants are due for a meet-up with the AFC champion this decade and only the frozen tundra stands in the way.
And a certain quarterback looking to possibly end his career in Glendale, Arizona. And a hot rookie running back who learned quickly how even more important it is to hold onto the rock with both arms in the playoffs.
Still, this one could go either way. Both teams’ defenses have holes and both have been hot offensively in the last month or so. It is just that close. But I have to pick one of these two clubs to be this year’s sacrificial lamb to New England in two weeks.
Green Bay wins 35-28 and Favre gets to say hello to Troy Brown, the only other remaining player from the 1997 Super Bowl teams.
*Frogster’s Pick: Green Bay 35, New York 10
*Rickey’s Pick: Giants 21, Packers 10.
Next time on the weekend sports column: Fantasy Football Awards for 2007. Who was the best, the most disappointing, the comeback fantasy player?
The weekend sports column is written by Chris Cameron and can be read every Saturday here at Angry Seafood.
humor-blogs.com has nothing to do with sports. Click there for funny instead.
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