Not only did Dark Knight lack any kind of humor, it may be one of the worst films I have ever seen. Batman & Robin was worlds better. When I heard Estell Geddy died, it reminded me of another film better then the Bat-Failure: Stop or My Mom will Shoot.
Hell, even the old television show was more entertaining.
The old-walking-up-the wall trick, now those were special effects. All Batman does in Dark Knight is skydive. Frigging unimpressive if you ask me. Hell, even James Bond can climb things with his magic jumping ability in Casino Royal. And didn’t some guy climb a skyscraper the other day without his bat-cable and bat-grappling hook?
There aren’t even any of the trademark ‘Thwack’ and ‘Pow’ sounds either. How I didn’t walk out is beyond me.
Then there is Batman’s voice. He talks so deeply as if he is trying to break the world record for lowest-recorded human octave. I still don’t understand why they didn’t bring back Val Kilmer. He was awesome as the winged crusader and didn’t have a corny superhero voice.
I am hoping in the next film, Batman gets throat cancer and loses his larynx. Then he can talk with an electronic Bat-voice. But that would make it easier to figure out that Bruce Wayne is the Dark Knight. Then again nobody questions Clark Kent and all he does is wear glasses. Superman can never ever get contacts or Lasik which must suck but this is not about an actual cool superhero. This is about a creepy rich guy with a bat fetish.
Please, no more loud whispering.
Speaking of bad vocals, everyone is raving about the Joker. Blah blah blah. No villain with that nasally voice would have made it in the real world. There would have been constant jokes where his fellow cohorts and underlings would hold their nose and say “Kill the Batman” followed by “Joker’s standing right behind me isn’t he?”
That would cause a lot of employee turnover, something no CEO or mob leader wants. There is no way this would work in real life. Thankfully, Ledger isn’t around to repeat his horrific performance. It was so bad the role killed him.
Of course the new ‘trilogy’ copies the old one. So they started with Sandman instead of the Joker. Big deal. Here we go again with Two-Face. Maybe in the third one Verne Troyer can play the Penguin. I wonder who will play Robin? How about that kid in Journey to the Center of the Earth? He’s annoying enough to take on the role of a lifetime.
To top it all off, the Dark Knight becomes a bad guy at the end. I am so tired of them changing the plots of the old comic books. What’s next, Spiderman having an evil suit? Someone besides Tony Stark in the iron suit? Hulk being separated from Bruce Banner? Stop messing with the real continuity and story arcs for the love of God!
I think the final scenes would have been a lot better if Angelina Jolie showed up and threw her bullet, killing Batman, the Joker, anyone who green-lighted this train wreck, and finally herself because all of their names showed up on the weave. Then we could finally move on to a real superhero and have some humor at the same time.
Coming Thursday….a guest post by Les James from the #1 political humor blog on the internet.
Even the Dark Knight loves funny blogs.
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Brent asked me to do a guest post for him and I went, er rolled up (and you know where that leads…never gonna tell a lie and hurt you…) a 
